Today as I ate lunch, the afternoon news reported that the current temperature was 35°C. Thirty-five celcius is approximately 1,054° F.

When it gets to be this hot, I find my self thinking about cooling down in any way possible. Walking to the comedor for some juice, I notice a large ice cooler.

“Hielo Glacial“, with a seal on the front balancing an ice cube on his nose. Oh to be that lucky seal! Or maybe, I could just jump into his ice cooler.

No, the way to go is to have a company pool. Take out the warehouse and put in a pool. We can have a barbecue for lunch, and just swim for a bit before getting back to work. Oh and towels should be provided.

The juice is really good today, a little coconutty. Icy cold. Maybe I could take a swim in the juice pitcher. No that would be sticky and attract flies.

Yesterday was a holiday. “Día de los Héroes” they call it. Heroes’ Day. Coincidentally we are getting “Heroes” (slogan: No, we are NOT X-Men) the TV show here too… Seems suspicious…

Back in the olden days, there was a crazy president of Paraguay who started a war, where the sparsely populated Paraguay battled Brazil. And Bolivia. And Argentina. That war ended so successfully (1 million dead and extensive territory lost) that now there is a holiday to celebrate this president. And I got a day off from work. Sweet. Thanks, crazy!

Today people celebrate this holiday by going out and completely filling every bar in the city the night before. I also heard fireworks occasionally throughout the day, which may or may not be related to the holiday. I personally spent my holiday sleeping, watching the episodes of Los that I downloaded, and reading magazines at the pool.

At the pool, the owner asked me why I don’t tan. “You’re always at the pool but your skin doesn’t get darker,” he tells me. I say, “I never go outside before 2 pm, because the sun is the strongest during those times,” and really I haven’t gotten burnt since I have been here. And I am also much tanner than when I got here. I just thought it was a funny thing to say to me. Much funnier than the time he told me I am looking more “robust, fat” and I should not eat so many hamburgers. Have I ever mentioned that this man is nearly blind and half senile?

So I have also started riding the bus home from work. I finally found out that there is a bus that takes me from work to the gym. Once I get done with the gym there’s one more that takes me right home in like 3 minutes. The only problem is that there is no way to take these busses in the opposite direction. I can get to the gym from home, but the #32 bus that takes me home from work doesn’t go in the opposite direction. I found this out the hard way one morning when Florencia was out of town. After waiting 30 minutes and not seeing one bus #32, I started looking for a taxi. I guess all the taxi drivers were sleeping in, because there were absolutely none at the nearest taxi stand. After another 15 minutes of wandering around I found one.

Cab driver: “What bus were you waiting for”
Me: “HUH??” (Cab drivers are nearly impossible to understand)
CD: “What.. bus…?”
Me: “Oh, um #32.”
CD: “No, that bus doesn’t go in this direction.”
Me: “Ohhhh.” Huh? How can it only go in one direction?

Still haven’t figured out this crazy bus system. But anyway, the busses are an endless source of frustration and ingenuity. I say ingenuity but there really is no word to describe the endless line of vendors, jumping on and off the bus, selling anything and everything: Candy, gum, soda, juice. Donuts. Bread. Toothbrushes. Nail clippers and manicure sets. Singing. Playing the guitar.

The busses themselves are archaelogical finds. I imagine the city government struck a deal with the survivors of ancient Vesuvius.  ”Well, you don’t really have anyone left to ride your busses… just give ‘em to us.” Afterwards, the Asuncion bus drivers put up their colorful fringe and stickers of Jesus and Mary in the front windshield, and set out on their campaign against using brakes. I hear that sometimes the bus drivers even race each other down the highway. Needless to say there are a lot of car accidents here.

So what else has been going on here? Well, Sunday night José and I had another sold out performance of epic proportions at the karaoke. Yellow, Otherside, Hey Ya, and some song I didn’t know by Blur. Hey Ya was a bit of a challenge, considering the words were misspelled and generally did not match the song. Otherwise we once again brought down the house. (“The house” consisted of a table of 3 middle aged women and 2 other people who loved U2.) The karaoke we went to was called “Karaoke #3″ of La Choppería del Puerto. Why Karaoke #3? Well evidently there are 2 other Karaokes within the bar-restaurant which takes up almost the whole block but is divided into several smaller sections, so each one is like an individually functioning karaoke. They just all have the same name… and the same guy running it on Sunday nights so it was a little slow. Next time, I will remember my camera. There’s always next time…